I went to my regular coffee spot this morning and cheerfully payed for my coffee answering a question asked by the attendant “are you having a good day” my response “Yes thanks..very relaxing and chill” following with “I start work at 3”
The attendant’s affect changed from a kind of robotic posture and tone to the release of a slumped “Ugh work! don’t you hate the thought of it”
Shrugging off the pressure of social niceties I considered this question or perhaps statement, albeit backhanded, carefully and without haste I replied politely “Actually I love my job”
While driving away I pondered the nature of language which I guess you could say is the result of conditioning, as awareness of such is a big part of the training at ‘work’
I considered this word ‘work’ eventually googling it as I have done often when I incidentally became aware that I had misconceptions of the meanings of words quite often.
I discovered – labour, toil, exertion, effort, slog, drudgery etc in association.
Back to the social pressure thing.. I have personally grappled with this at times along my journey and it has for me been a huge learning opportunity and catalyst for change and personal growth in my life.
Having discovered the nature of such things and the fear at the base of them (fear of not being accepted, being wrong, of confrontation, being held hostage in a meaningless conversation! and more) I no longer feel obliged to be aligned with another’s view, no matter how ‘socially attuned’ ‘moral/ethical’ such views may be, or simply just to avoid an awkward standoff!
However I have practiced the art of discovering my part in how things occur in my daily life, there is some self examination involved in this process and If you the reader are curious to find some answers for yourself about why certain things that ‘shouldn’t be a biggie’ effect you adversely and repeatedly, taking up much ‘headspace’ I’d be happy to point you to the various resources which availed me of ‘the truth of how I operate’
Thus I realised that having used the word ‘work’ in ‘my’ conversation, had brought about a moment in which a space was created for awareness in one and possibly two people today during this brief exchange, which could very easily have gone as It has so many times before.. without actual eye contact.
I conclude with an adjustment in my referral to one of the very things that give my life such purpose today,
‘Work’ will now be ’Gig’ for those who know me well or ‘loving service’ otherwise.